"Dammit!"
Um... I do believe that this was the first time this season that Jack has uttered his now famous catchphrase. Oh, I remember when the catchphrase was something more creative, like "Today is the longest day of my life" or "Somebody get me a hacksaw!"
Um... I really don't remember much about this episode. That's how memorable it was. I do remember that Jack and Logan travel to the Russian Consulate because Logan is positive that the Consul is connected to the terrorist attacks. Logan has a private meeting with the Consul, who is completely stereotypically over-the-top, so I'll start calling him Boris. Boris is shifty-eyed, and verry verry eeeevil, so he's totally involved. Which he is - he calls Gredenko and is all, "They're heere!" Logan tells Jack that Boris is lying, so Jack breaks back into the Consulate (idiot!) and gets caught (idiot!) and the best part is that this has already happened to him (bigger idiot!). On the plus side of this, Jack tortures Boris and gets pertinent information out of him, and then is caught. Dammit!
Meanwhile, Wayne isn't dead (awww!) and Dr. Bashir is dead (AWWWW!!), so Evil Daniels takes over. Evil Daniels is notified by Logan that Boris knows where Gredenko is, so Evil Daniels has a kinda awkward phone conversation with President Suvarov, promising retalliation or something. I kinda forgot. All I do remember is that Logan realizes that Martha is the only person who can get the Suvarovs to cooperate... with... something. Oh! Giving the okay to barge in on the Consulate. Right. Oh, and all these hours that Karen Hayes has been MIA (supposedly on an airplane to LA), she's really been chilling in the airport, so she's all, "I think I'ma go back to work." Yes.
"Secret Lovers": Reed tells his ONE co-conspirator to let Lennox go, and Lennox agrees to remain silent. Then, he totally turns Reed in, and Reed has the shocked and betrayed look only one wronged lover can give another. But all is right (wrong) with the world when Evil Daniels gives Lennox a Faustian offer: say that Dr. Bashir was behind the assassination attempt, and then Evil Daniels will turn the US into a police state like Lennox wanted. So Lennox's all, "Okay."
Whatever. I was bored. This show is getting boring. Like, yeah, there were explosions and shit because nowadays there are always explosions and shit, but none of it meant anything to me and the story's getting ridiculous. In a bad way. Not even over-the-top melodrama, but just very very VERY sloppily written. Because it's just boring.
Oh! And Sean Callery (the composer) totally ripped off John Williams' JFK score for this episode, and no, that's not cool. Just because the original was a good score doesn't mean you can just take it and put it in your own project when it doesn't have the same context. If Callery had stolen the E.T. theme and put it in a scene with Chloe doing some computer stuff and talking technobabble, people would be making a shit fit. So, I am with this. While in JFK, said piece of music was used when Laurie Metcalfe describes the possibility that Lee Harvey Oswald was a US spy in Russia, here, it's Logan thinking and talking with Jack, very calmly, sans urgency. Whatever.
All in all: C-
Until next time, same bat time, same bat channel.
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
Monday, March 5, 2007
Rome 2.07: Death Mask
"On order of the Triumverate, during Prince Herod's residency here, all mockery of Jews and their one God shall be kept to an appropriate minimum!"
There are many reasons to love Rome: epic panoramic scenes, a cast of... hundreds, powerful Royal Shakespeare Company-trained actors, wonderful scripts, amazing set and costume design, etc. However, there are three main resons why I love it: the blood, the fucking, and the evil bitch catfights. And that's what this episode was - many, many catfights. Let's see, shall we?
1. Memmio vs. Vorenus: We finally discover what Memmio's eeevil plan to bring Vorenus down is. He has Omnipor fucking Vorena (which he does, which is kinda gross, seeing as how Omnipor is like a skinny, greasy hippie, and Vorena still looks like she's thirteen), then catches them (which he does), then basically blackmails Vorena into spying on Vorenus for him (which she begins to do, but finds nothing of importance this episode) or else he will tell Vorenus on her (which at first, she doesn't care because she "HATES HIM!!!" as she yells every chance she gets... then she realizes that he totally has the power and the rage to kill her (which he wouldn't... dumb teenager)). This plan, I fear, is the beginning of the end of the Vorenii.
2. Eirene vs. Gaia: Gaia is walking around all high and mighty, and when Eirene commands her to do some chore, Gaia's all, "Fuck you." Then Eirene's all, "I'm gonna tell Pullo to beat the shit out of you!" Then Pullo goes to beat Gaia, which only leads to them fucking (no!!!). Well, actually, he beats her while he's fucking her, which she totally digs. After that, Gaia is totally placated, and Eirene gives her a "I'm still wifey, bitch!" look, to which Gaia responds with a "You don't know this, bitch, but this ripper's fucking him!" Eirene tells Pullo that he should beat Gaia once a month, which goes to prove that no one can be crueler than an ex-slave. Or a pregnant ex-slave, in Eirene's case. Or "plegnant," as poor foreign Eirene says. At the end of the episode, Gaia travels to some apothocary, who gives her some ancient Roman abortion drug. And the evil look on Gaia's face tells us that it's not for her. Dun dun DUN!!! So... the Romans were pro-choice, then.
3. The World vs. Jocasta: Now that Jocasta's gone down in the social ladder due her family being massacred, it's up to Atia to marry her off. To Posca. Oh, that's fucked up! Can Atia be any meaner? Oh, yes she can... by making the wedding take place in the fucking stable. As opposed to the fucking stable. Jocasta's bawling all through the ceremony, but I don't know whether it's because she's marrying Posca or because she really, really needs a joint.
4. Timon and Levi vs. Herod: Herod has rolled into town to give a bribe to the triumverate to become the king of Judea. Timon and Levi obviously don't like this idea, so Levi comes up with the brilliant idea of assassinating him at the wedding tomorrow (which wedding? We'll find out later). Timon is sad since he knows they won't emerge alive, and has a last supper with his family. No pun intended. At the wedding, the brothers are ready when suddenly Timon has a change of heart after seeing Atia (who he's still totally in love with). Plus, I think he remembered that he was in the middle of his redemption arc. Levi gets pissed, they struggle, Timon accidentally stabs and kills Levi. The look on Timon's face, by the way, is heartbreaking.
5. Antony vs. Octavian: The triumverate's totally on shaky ground, especially with Herod giving them the bribe that they don't know how to divy up. In order to bring stability to the triumverate and the republic, Octavian proposes a marriage between Antony and one of the women in Octavian's family. The logical choice is Atia, seeing as how she and Antony are the same age and how they're fucking and how Atia's in love with him. But, alas, Octavian has the last laugh by arranging the marriage between Antony and Octavia. Obviously, no one is happy at the wedding except Octavian, and by happy, I mean he blinks once as opposed to not blinking. Antony is uncomfortable, Atia is heartbroken and pissed, and Octavia and Agrippa are in agony. But, I guess, life's a bitch, and so is Octavian. And just because the marriage was political doesn't mean there can't be sex... all Antony needs is some spit for lube and a willing body to do it doggie style.
And now, the catfight of all catfights:
6. Atia and Servilia: Servilia is racked with grief over Brutus' death, quite obviously, since she was his mother and all. She then pulls a Cindy Sheehan and stands outside Atia's door, yelling "Atia of the Julii, I call for justice!" And this is totally where good RSC Voice and Speech training comes in handy for Lindsay Duncan. She stands out there for days, and then Atia shows up at the door. Servilia, now covered by Brutus' ashes, ushers out one of her epic curses to Atia ("Gods below, I am Servilia of the most ancient and sacred Junii upon whose bones the seven hills of Rome are built. I summon you to listen. Curse this woman! Send her bitterness and despair for all of her life! Let her taste nothing but ashes and iron! Gods of the underworld, all that I have left I give to you in sacrifice if you will make it so!" ) And then, she stabs herself with a sword. Wow. Like... wow! Servilia's dead! Then her slave kills herself. All in the street in front of Atia, Antony, Octavia, and the others. Atia totally starts taking this curse stuff to heart, since after the wedding she believes the curse may be coming true. Point: Servilia.
I am so SAD that there are only three episodes left!
All in all: A
Until next time, same bat time, same bat channel.
There are many reasons to love Rome: epic panoramic scenes, a cast of... hundreds, powerful Royal Shakespeare Company-trained actors, wonderful scripts, amazing set and costume design, etc. However, there are three main resons why I love it: the blood, the fucking, and the evil bitch catfights. And that's what this episode was - many, many catfights. Let's see, shall we?
1. Memmio vs. Vorenus: We finally discover what Memmio's eeevil plan to bring Vorenus down is. He has Omnipor fucking Vorena (which he does, which is kinda gross, seeing as how Omnipor is like a skinny, greasy hippie, and Vorena still looks like she's thirteen), then catches them (which he does), then basically blackmails Vorena into spying on Vorenus for him (which she begins to do, but finds nothing of importance this episode) or else he will tell Vorenus on her (which at first, she doesn't care because she "HATES HIM!!!" as she yells every chance she gets... then she realizes that he totally has the power and the rage to kill her (which he wouldn't... dumb teenager)). This plan, I fear, is the beginning of the end of the Vorenii.
2. Eirene vs. Gaia: Gaia is walking around all high and mighty, and when Eirene commands her to do some chore, Gaia's all, "Fuck you." Then Eirene's all, "I'm gonna tell Pullo to beat the shit out of you!" Then Pullo goes to beat Gaia, which only leads to them fucking (no!!!). Well, actually, he beats her while he's fucking her, which she totally digs. After that, Gaia is totally placated, and Eirene gives her a "I'm still wifey, bitch!" look, to which Gaia responds with a "You don't know this, bitch, but this ripper's fucking him!" Eirene tells Pullo that he should beat Gaia once a month, which goes to prove that no one can be crueler than an ex-slave. Or a pregnant ex-slave, in Eirene's case. Or "plegnant," as poor foreign Eirene says. At the end of the episode, Gaia travels to some apothocary, who gives her some ancient Roman abortion drug. And the evil look on Gaia's face tells us that it's not for her. Dun dun DUN!!! So... the Romans were pro-choice, then.
3. The World vs. Jocasta: Now that Jocasta's gone down in the social ladder due her family being massacred, it's up to Atia to marry her off. To Posca. Oh, that's fucked up! Can Atia be any meaner? Oh, yes she can... by making the wedding take place in the fucking stable. As opposed to the fucking stable. Jocasta's bawling all through the ceremony, but I don't know whether it's because she's marrying Posca or because she really, really needs a joint.
4. Timon and Levi vs. Herod: Herod has rolled into town to give a bribe to the triumverate to become the king of Judea. Timon and Levi obviously don't like this idea, so Levi comes up with the brilliant idea of assassinating him at the wedding tomorrow (which wedding? We'll find out later). Timon is sad since he knows they won't emerge alive, and has a last supper with his family. No pun intended. At the wedding, the brothers are ready when suddenly Timon has a change of heart after seeing Atia (who he's still totally in love with). Plus, I think he remembered that he was in the middle of his redemption arc. Levi gets pissed, they struggle, Timon accidentally stabs and kills Levi. The look on Timon's face, by the way, is heartbreaking.
5. Antony vs. Octavian: The triumverate's totally on shaky ground, especially with Herod giving them the bribe that they don't know how to divy up. In order to bring stability to the triumverate and the republic, Octavian proposes a marriage between Antony and one of the women in Octavian's family. The logical choice is Atia, seeing as how she and Antony are the same age and how they're fucking and how Atia's in love with him. But, alas, Octavian has the last laugh by arranging the marriage between Antony and Octavia. Obviously, no one is happy at the wedding except Octavian, and by happy, I mean he blinks once as opposed to not blinking. Antony is uncomfortable, Atia is heartbroken and pissed, and Octavia and Agrippa are in agony. But, I guess, life's a bitch, and so is Octavian. And just because the marriage was political doesn't mean there can't be sex... all Antony needs is some spit for lube and a willing body to do it doggie style.
And now, the catfight of all catfights:
6. Atia and Servilia: Servilia is racked with grief over Brutus' death, quite obviously, since she was his mother and all. She then pulls a Cindy Sheehan and stands outside Atia's door, yelling "Atia of the Julii, I call for justice!" And this is totally where good RSC Voice and Speech training comes in handy for Lindsay Duncan. She stands out there for days, and then Atia shows up at the door. Servilia, now covered by Brutus' ashes, ushers out one of her epic curses to Atia ("Gods below, I am Servilia of the most ancient and sacred Junii upon whose bones the seven hills of Rome are built. I summon you to listen. Curse this woman! Send her bitterness and despair for all of her life! Let her taste nothing but ashes and iron! Gods of the underworld, all that I have left I give to you in sacrifice if you will make it so!" ) And then, she stabs herself with a sword. Wow. Like... wow! Servilia's dead! Then her slave kills herself. All in the street in front of Atia, Antony, Octavia, and the others. Atia totally starts taking this curse stuff to heart, since after the wedding she believes the curse may be coming true. Point: Servilia.
I am so SAD that there are only three episodes left!
All in all: A
Until next time, same bat time, same bat channel.
Brothers and Sisters 1.16: The Other Walker
"I told you that lamp was really gay! And ugly!"
Silly, silly Sarah. You stupid bitch. I love how I think I'm going to start every blog about Brothers and Sisters like that. Anyways, Sarah is being completely stupid this episode. Mainly because she meets Rebecca (which is actually a fairly poignant moment), and then spills the beans on the fact that she's her sister and she hates her on principle. This causes a huge rift between Rebecca and Holly, and Holly takes Sarah's actions as a declaration of war. Sarah's all "Bring it!" Except that I'm not rooting for either of them because a war between them, at least the way it's being handled, is competely stupid.
The rest of the family is also dealing with Rebecca's reappearance... and some of them are dealing with her existence at all. Sarah, Tommy, Kevin, and Saul swear an oath of secrecy about her and decide not to tell the others, but Saul relents when he takes Nora out to lunch and she tells him she's considering making Holly part of the family. "Oh, by the way, Nora, William had ANOTHER KID!!" Nora is rightfully upset, but I am glad that Saul did it and the way he did was very touching. Of course, the Three Musketeers berate Saul for telling Nora, but he's all, "What am I supposed to do? Keep it from her?" And they're like, "Yeah! That's what we promised!" Whatever.
Kitty and Justin find out, and while Kitty freaks out in her very verbose Ally McBeal-kinda way (except without the hallucinations of a dancing baby and Barry White), Justin is the only person who's all, "Hey, has anyone wondered how Rebecca's feeling about all this?" So, he's the only one who goes to meet her and has an awkward yet sweet half-sibling to half-sibling chat.
Oh, and some gossip website is targeting Chad of being a secret homo (which he is) after catching some photos of him and Kevin lamp-shopping (which they were) and this whole silly scenario is really because Chad wants to subconsciously get outted (which he totally does), and Kevin threatens to sue the rag, which totally implicates Chad. They agree to keep their relationship to late-night fucking. Apropos.
I very much like this show, and I'm totally interested in where it'll go now that the long-alluded-to Rebecca is now in the picture. What makes the show work better as opposed to other such family shows is the politics - be it the literal politics (Republican vs. Democrat, the Iraq war, gay marriage) or the personal politics (who am I siding with? who is right?), and now with the prospect of a war within the family, I'm pretty thrilled with the possiblities. Let's hope they follow through on them.
All in all: A-
Until next time, same bat time, same bat channel.
Desperate Housewives 3.16: My Husband, The Pig
"To me, he always has that shifty look of a guy who knows where the bodies are buried. He should know. He buried them."
I remember in Season One right after Mrs. Huber was killed that speculation ran rampant online that she was gonna take over for Mary Alice one episode and narrate the episode from the Great Suburbia in the Sky. But that never happened. And has never happened... Mary Alice has never relinquished her narration duties (one episode this season kinda did that with Alma giving the closing narration to Edie, however). But this episode gives Mary Alice a day off, and we are taken along for the ride this time by none other than... drum roll please... Rex Fucking Van de Kamp! How I miss you, Rex, how awesome you are/were. How Marcia Cross is in need of a great sparring partner! I mean, this isn't a diss to Kyle MacLachlan (I love me some Agent Cooper, of course), but when Bree is the more normal of the couple, then things are a bit strange. Rex always grounded her and, let's not lie, Rex is the only man that Bree has ever truly loved. George? Whatever! She killed him. Orson? I don't think so. Pure plot contrivance.
Rex begins his Dead Person Voice Over by stating how much his family has gone to shit since he's died (agreed) and how he's glad he's dead. Ha! Then, Rex tells us that this episode is not going to focus exclusively on the Desperate Housewives of Wisteria Lane, but on the Desperate Husbands, which I think totally rocks! As much as I love me some Susanlynettebreegabrielleedie, I would totally dig a show about Miketomcarlosorsonian. Or... maybe I will just settle for the occassional episode.
Anyways, Carlos, still living with Mike, is totally horned up and cruising some Internet dating site, where he has found a "complete freak with serious daddy issues." His night is ruined, however, when Edie shows up at the door with her long-lost son, Travers (Travers? Edie, what kind of a name is that?), who has been alluded to since the pilot, but never seen. Edie asks if Carlos can babysit that night while she goes to some drunken soiree, and Carlos says that he can't since he's hoping to get laid. That night, as he's trying to score with Crazy Chick Freak with Daddy Issues, he sees Travers alone on the street, and Carlos runs out to save him. Which totally makes sense, judging from how many people have been killed/run over/attacked on this block alone. Internet Chick storms out, and when a drunken Edie comes home to collect Travers, Carlos gives her a vicious tongue lashing. And no, not like that. They have another intense and great scene the next morning, and Edie says that she may not be a good mother, but that she's a realistic one. Carlos feels bad and says he can take care of Travers if need be. Awww... seriously. So well-acted.
Tom, meanwhile, is planning a big surprise anniversary thing for Lynnette, who, despite being all supportive of the pizza parlor, in no way deserves a surprise anniversary thing, because, as we remember, she was basically tortured into supporting Tom. Whatever. Anyways, of course, in good old-fashioned Desperate Housewives fashion, the surprise goes awry and Tom ends up rescuing a nearly-frostbitten Lynnette from the forest and rekindling their romance in a diner. There're too many things to type up about that plot that... I just don't want to.
Mike and Ian have a guy catfight over Susan when Mike realizes that Ian just proposed to Susan before Mike remembered that he was going to. They duke it out (or, as works on this show, snarkily exchange catty comments) over a poker game where all our Desperate Husbands have converged. They end up facing each other with one hand, and if Ian wins, then Mike can never speak of this to Susan again and he'll marry her, and if Ian loses, then... Mike can tell Susan whatever he wants. Ian ends up winning in a reveal a few minutes before the episode ends. Sadly, I was totally invested in Tom and Carlos' side comments rather than the big showdown. They're both like, "What the fuck is this nonsense? I just came to do two things: play some cards and drink beer."
Umm... Oh yeah! Bree and Orson are going on their honeymoon. Bree left a few days early (because Marcia Cross just had babies... oh, you smart and clever writers), and right as Orson is about to leave, Danielle discovers that she's pregnant... by Austin! Dun dun DUN! Orson pretends that it's 1953 and sends Danielle off to a convent in the mountains so that she can have the baby in secret (saying that she's in boarding school), and Andrew returns to his Gay Iago ways and convinces Austin to blow town, rather than stay and reconciliate with Julie. Austin, being the dumb himbo he is, follows this adivce. Buh-bye, Austin!
Oh, and some rich guy wants to do Gabrielle. Again.
It was refreshing to see the episode from the male point of view, but I'm still unsure where the story's going for the remainder of the season. There's inklings of things, but I'm unsure. And I kinda like it. Though some of the things in this episode (basically Gabby's new rich stalker) seemed a bit trod-upon. Good, not golden.
All in all: B+
Until next time, same bat time, same bat channel.
I remember in Season One right after Mrs. Huber was killed that speculation ran rampant online that she was gonna take over for Mary Alice one episode and narrate the episode from the Great Suburbia in the Sky. But that never happened. And has never happened... Mary Alice has never relinquished her narration duties (one episode this season kinda did that with Alma giving the closing narration to Edie, however). But this episode gives Mary Alice a day off, and we are taken along for the ride this time by none other than... drum roll please... Rex Fucking Van de Kamp! How I miss you, Rex, how awesome you are/were. How Marcia Cross is in need of a great sparring partner! I mean, this isn't a diss to Kyle MacLachlan (I love me some Agent Cooper, of course), but when Bree is the more normal of the couple, then things are a bit strange. Rex always grounded her and, let's not lie, Rex is the only man that Bree has ever truly loved. George? Whatever! She killed him. Orson? I don't think so. Pure plot contrivance.
Rex begins his Dead Person Voice Over by stating how much his family has gone to shit since he's died (agreed) and how he's glad he's dead. Ha! Then, Rex tells us that this episode is not going to focus exclusively on the Desperate Housewives of Wisteria Lane, but on the Desperate Husbands, which I think totally rocks! As much as I love me some Susanlynettebreegabrielleedie, I would totally dig a show about Miketomcarlosorsonian. Or... maybe I will just settle for the occassional episode.
Anyways, Carlos, still living with Mike, is totally horned up and cruising some Internet dating site, where he has found a "complete freak with serious daddy issues." His night is ruined, however, when Edie shows up at the door with her long-lost son, Travers (Travers? Edie, what kind of a name is that?), who has been alluded to since the pilot, but never seen. Edie asks if Carlos can babysit that night while she goes to some drunken soiree, and Carlos says that he can't since he's hoping to get laid. That night, as he's trying to score with Crazy Chick Freak with Daddy Issues, he sees Travers alone on the street, and Carlos runs out to save him. Which totally makes sense, judging from how many people have been killed/run over/attacked on this block alone. Internet Chick storms out, and when a drunken Edie comes home to collect Travers, Carlos gives her a vicious tongue lashing. And no, not like that. They have another intense and great scene the next morning, and Edie says that she may not be a good mother, but that she's a realistic one. Carlos feels bad and says he can take care of Travers if need be. Awww... seriously. So well-acted.
Tom, meanwhile, is planning a big surprise anniversary thing for Lynnette, who, despite being all supportive of the pizza parlor, in no way deserves a surprise anniversary thing, because, as we remember, she was basically tortured into supporting Tom. Whatever. Anyways, of course, in good old-fashioned Desperate Housewives fashion, the surprise goes awry and Tom ends up rescuing a nearly-frostbitten Lynnette from the forest and rekindling their romance in a diner. There're too many things to type up about that plot that... I just don't want to.
Mike and Ian have a guy catfight over Susan when Mike realizes that Ian just proposed to Susan before Mike remembered that he was going to. They duke it out (or, as works on this show, snarkily exchange catty comments) over a poker game where all our Desperate Husbands have converged. They end up facing each other with one hand, and if Ian wins, then Mike can never speak of this to Susan again and he'll marry her, and if Ian loses, then... Mike can tell Susan whatever he wants. Ian ends up winning in a reveal a few minutes before the episode ends. Sadly, I was totally invested in Tom and Carlos' side comments rather than the big showdown. They're both like, "What the fuck is this nonsense? I just came to do two things: play some cards and drink beer."
Umm... Oh yeah! Bree and Orson are going on their honeymoon. Bree left a few days early (because Marcia Cross just had babies... oh, you smart and clever writers), and right as Orson is about to leave, Danielle discovers that she's pregnant... by Austin! Dun dun DUN! Orson pretends that it's 1953 and sends Danielle off to a convent in the mountains so that she can have the baby in secret (saying that she's in boarding school), and Andrew returns to his Gay Iago ways and convinces Austin to blow town, rather than stay and reconciliate with Julie. Austin, being the dumb himbo he is, follows this adivce. Buh-bye, Austin!
Oh, and some rich guy wants to do Gabrielle. Again.
It was refreshing to see the episode from the male point of view, but I'm still unsure where the story's going for the remainder of the season. There's inklings of things, but I'm unsure. And I kinda like it. Though some of the things in this episode (basically Gabby's new rich stalker) seemed a bit trod-upon. Good, not golden.
All in all: B+
Until next time, same bat time, same bat channel.
Lost 3.10: Tricia Tanaka Is Dead
"What's the problem, jumbotron?"
"Stop calling me names, Red... neck... Man..."
Now, the thing with the flashbacks on the island is that each characters' flashbacks have their own feeling, their own mood, and Hurley's flashbacks are usually pretty humorous, yet intrinsically connected to the island's goings-on, and there is a musical montage ending. I usually love Hurley's episodes - in fact, the major tear-jerking moment for me of this show's history was in Hurley's second flashback "Everybody Hates Hugo." This one, however, I must say is probably my least favorite of the Hurley episodes because... I don't know. Let's talk it out.
It starts off totally promising - Hurley is at Libby's grave (awwww!) and giving this heartbreaking speech to her when Vincent (!) returns and leads Hurley to an abandoned VW bus, complete with a decomposing Dharma dude inside. Hurley and Charlie make it their mission to get the bus up and running, for purely symbolic reasons: both want to outrun their fate - Hurley's curse with the numbers and Charlie's gonna die fate. They enlist Sawyer (who has just returned with Kate to the camp) and Jin to help them, also with a twelve-pack of Dharma Initiative Light Beer. Nice product placement, ABC. Anyway, Hurley and Charlie get the bus working, then decide to drive it down a hill into a patch of rocks to tempt fate with... and they survive! Cue the musical montage.
In flashback, Hurley's dad returns (played by the awesome Cheech Marin) after he wins the lotto money, all sleazy-like. Hurley is rightfully suspicious, but Cheech says that he's returned also to do Hurley's mom (which... wow. And also, here's a nitpick of mine: in the first few flashbacks of Hurley's, Carmen, played by Lillian Hurst, was Hurley's grandmother, but now she's his mother. Which is very strange.). Cheech says he's gonna cure Hurley of his cure, which is a very Spic-ish thing to say (believe me, I am one), and takes him to a fortune teller, in a hilarious scene that makes it obvious that Cheech paid her to "cure" Hurley of the curse. I must say, I am always impressed by how this show uses fortune tellers and psychics in the flashbacks, but this is the first time that it was for comic relief. And it was... it was something. Cheech then admits that he did come back for the money, but is going to leave him with honor. Or something.
Oh! And the episode title? Hurley has bought the Chicken Shack, and reporter Tricia Tanaka (and who else wasn't thinking "Asian Reporter Tricia Takanawa?" Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?) is doing a story on it. When she dies. When the Chicken Shack is hit. By a FRICKIN' METEORITE!I know! Oh, those wacky numbers and their curse!
I don't know. This episode was very good, and solid, but... sadly, it seems forgettable to me. It's not a bad episode like, say, the past three Sun-and-Jin episodes, but... I feel like it'll fall into the shuffle, which is kinda sad since thusfar all of Hurley's episodes have been ridiculously memorable. But, we all can't win all the time.
All in all: B
Until next time, same bat time, same bat channel.
"Stop calling me names, Red... neck... Man..."
Now, the thing with the flashbacks on the island is that each characters' flashbacks have their own feeling, their own mood, and Hurley's flashbacks are usually pretty humorous, yet intrinsically connected to the island's goings-on, and there is a musical montage ending. I usually love Hurley's episodes - in fact, the major tear-jerking moment for me of this show's history was in Hurley's second flashback "Everybody Hates Hugo." This one, however, I must say is probably my least favorite of the Hurley episodes because... I don't know. Let's talk it out.
It starts off totally promising - Hurley is at Libby's grave (awwww!) and giving this heartbreaking speech to her when Vincent (!) returns and leads Hurley to an abandoned VW bus, complete with a decomposing Dharma dude inside. Hurley and Charlie make it their mission to get the bus up and running, for purely symbolic reasons: both want to outrun their fate - Hurley's curse with the numbers and Charlie's gonna die fate. They enlist Sawyer (who has just returned with Kate to the camp) and Jin to help them, also with a twelve-pack of Dharma Initiative Light Beer. Nice product placement, ABC. Anyway, Hurley and Charlie get the bus working, then decide to drive it down a hill into a patch of rocks to tempt fate with... and they survive! Cue the musical montage.
In flashback, Hurley's dad returns (played by the awesome Cheech Marin) after he wins the lotto money, all sleazy-like. Hurley is rightfully suspicious, but Cheech says that he's returned also to do Hurley's mom (which... wow. And also, here's a nitpick of mine: in the first few flashbacks of Hurley's, Carmen, played by Lillian Hurst, was Hurley's grandmother, but now she's his mother. Which is very strange.). Cheech says he's gonna cure Hurley of his cure, which is a very Spic-ish thing to say (believe me, I am one), and takes him to a fortune teller, in a hilarious scene that makes it obvious that Cheech paid her to "cure" Hurley of the curse. I must say, I am always impressed by how this show uses fortune tellers and psychics in the flashbacks, but this is the first time that it was for comic relief. And it was... it was something. Cheech then admits that he did come back for the money, but is going to leave him with honor. Or something.
Oh! And the episode title? Hurley has bought the Chicken Shack, and reporter Tricia Tanaka (and who else wasn't thinking "Asian Reporter Tricia Takanawa?" Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?) is doing a story on it. When she dies. When the Chicken Shack is hit. By a FRICKIN' METEORITE!
I don't know. This episode was very good, and solid, but... sadly, it seems forgettable to me. It's not a bad episode like, say, the past three Sun-and-Jin episodes, but... I feel like it'll fall into the shuffle, which is kinda sad since thusfar all of Hurley's episodes have been ridiculously memorable. But, we all can't win all the time.
All in all: B
Until next time, same bat time, same bat channel.
Veronica Mars 3.15: Papa's Cabin
"Well, first, I'd break into someone's office, act really weaselly, and then ask their advice."
The final episode of the Who Killed Dean O'Dell arc has come to an end, and the final mystery arc of the season. And maybe of the entire series. Which really sucks, but hopefully Dawn Ostroff (Creative VP of Programming at The CW, and ex-head of UPN) won't inflict this on the show. The whole point is that it's a mystery show. Whatever. ANYWAYS, the final episode of the arc was pretty insane. I remember reading an interview with Rob Thomas saying that this final episode of the arc would be different from all other arc finales in that as opposed to Veronica solving the mystery halfway through the episode, then being menaced by the killer/culprit at the end, then saved by someone else (being chased through a junkyard by Aaron Echolls, then saved by Keith; threated by a gun and tasered on the Neptune Grand roof by Beaver, then saved by Logan; beaten up by Mercer in the dorm hallway, then saved by Parker), she was going to deduce through logic the killer and have a Sherlock Holmes finale that way. And boy, was it awesome.
In other storyland, Veronica gives her blessing for Logan and Parker to start dating, even though it kinda pains both of them; there is going to be a special election to determine the sheriff of Balboa County (or is it Neptune County now? Hmmm... are the continuity fairies overlooking this, or is there some reasonable real estate reason that this has changed that I'm unaware of?) since Keith is taking over only temporarily.
The explanation of the crime is completely convoluted and complicated, but I wouldn't have it any other way: Mindy explains that Dean O'Dell barged into the hotel room, confronts her and Landry, then tells Landry that he's gonna fire him and take away his tenure. He storms off and she's the one who visits his office during the time that Nish, Claire, and Fern were egging the office. She calms him down, giving him the Xanax, then returns to an empty hotel room. Landry is arrested, but he counters that the Dean also threatened Mindy with the pre-nup and she'd get ZIP. Mindy skips town after getting the life insurance check (which totally makes Mindy O'Dell a femme fatale in terms of the plot), and she buys a boat. Veronica and Tim team up to free Landry, and get him freed due to some fake alibi with a stripper bumming a smoke off him. By the time Keith figures that it's a fake alibi, Landry's skipped town looking for Mindy, who he believes framed him. Veronica listens to Landry's phone calls, hears a reference to "Papa's Cabin," and also hears Landry totally trash Tim to a potential employer. Awkward.
Keith is the one who solves what Papa's Cabin refers to, which is a Cabo getaway, and the scene in which he does it is absolutely hilarious since you have Veronica and Tim giving ridiculous reasoning as to where Landry could be, when Keith is all "Cabo. Duh!" Great. Anyways, in Cabo, we see that Landry has "accidentally" killed Mindy, which lands him in jail, as well as framing Batando to save Mindy, who he feels was the killer. Landry's arrested, Tim's made professor of the course, and he asks Veronica to be his TA. AH, but WAIT. All is not done: the missing piece of clue is the phone bug, which Veronica discovers in her phone, and she figures that Tim is the real killer, framing Landry for trashing him for this job. And they have a stare-down in the classroom which is amazing.
And I spot UCLA grad on Veronica Mars #3 in this episode: Robert Bastron, who plays one of Veronica's classmates. The others being Tanya Chisholm, playing Nancy Cooper (Rape Victim #...3 or something), and the eternally awesome James Jordan, who played Lucky the school-shooting janitor in Season Two and Tim now. Which means that Dean O'Dell's killer once gave me a drunken wedgie. Kinda cool.
This episode was pretty great, but it was a bit different than the previous ones, not because of the lack of thriller-ness, which a lot of people didn't care for, but because catching O'Dell's killer wasn't of super-major intensity to Veronica (whereas finding Lilly's killer and the bus bomber was, and the rapist became important once he tried to rape Veronica), so there was a lack of... conenction, despite the fact that she liked O'Dell so much. Alas. But, still awesome stuff. But, now, six weeks off, thanks to Who Will be the nextWhore Pussycat Doll or whatever it is.
All in all: A-
Until then, same bat time, same bat channel.
The final episode of the Who Killed Dean O'Dell arc has come to an end, and the final mystery arc of the season. And maybe of the entire series. Which really sucks, but hopefully Dawn Ostroff (Creative VP of Programming at The CW, and ex-head of UPN) won't inflict this on the show. The whole point is that it's a mystery show. Whatever. ANYWAYS, the final episode of the arc was pretty insane. I remember reading an interview with Rob Thomas saying that this final episode of the arc would be different from all other arc finales in that as opposed to Veronica solving the mystery halfway through the episode, then being menaced by the killer/culprit at the end, then saved by someone else (being chased through a junkyard by Aaron Echolls, then saved by Keith; threated by a gun and tasered on the Neptune Grand roof by Beaver, then saved by Logan; beaten up by Mercer in the dorm hallway, then saved by Parker), she was going to deduce through logic the killer and have a Sherlock Holmes finale that way. And boy, was it awesome.
In other storyland, Veronica gives her blessing for Logan and Parker to start dating, even though it kinda pains both of them; there is going to be a special election to determine the sheriff of Balboa County (or is it Neptune County now? Hmmm... are the continuity fairies overlooking this, or is there some reasonable real estate reason that this has changed that I'm unaware of?) since Keith is taking over only temporarily.
The explanation of the crime is completely convoluted and complicated, but I wouldn't have it any other way: Mindy explains that Dean O'Dell barged into the hotel room, confronts her and Landry, then tells Landry that he's gonna fire him and take away his tenure. He storms off and she's the one who visits his office during the time that Nish, Claire, and Fern were egging the office. She calms him down, giving him the Xanax, then returns to an empty hotel room. Landry is arrested, but he counters that the Dean also threatened Mindy with the pre-nup and she'd get ZIP. Mindy skips town after getting the life insurance check (which totally makes Mindy O'Dell a femme fatale in terms of the plot), and she buys a boat. Veronica and Tim team up to free Landry, and get him freed due to some fake alibi with a stripper bumming a smoke off him. By the time Keith figures that it's a fake alibi, Landry's skipped town looking for Mindy, who he believes framed him. Veronica listens to Landry's phone calls, hears a reference to "Papa's Cabin," and also hears Landry totally trash Tim to a potential employer. Awkward.
Keith is the one who solves what Papa's Cabin refers to, which is a Cabo getaway, and the scene in which he does it is absolutely hilarious since you have Veronica and Tim giving ridiculous reasoning as to where Landry could be, when Keith is all "Cabo. Duh!" Great. Anyways, in Cabo, we see that Landry has "accidentally" killed Mindy, which lands him in jail, as well as framing Batando to save Mindy, who he feels was the killer. Landry's arrested, Tim's made professor of the course, and he asks Veronica to be his TA. AH, but WAIT. All is not done: the missing piece of clue is the phone bug, which Veronica discovers in her phone, and she figures that Tim is the real killer, framing Landry for trashing him for this job. And they have a stare-down in the classroom which is amazing.
And I spot UCLA grad on Veronica Mars #3 in this episode: Robert Bastron, who plays one of Veronica's classmates. The others being Tanya Chisholm, playing Nancy Cooper (Rape Victim #...3 or something), and the eternally awesome James Jordan, who played Lucky the school-shooting janitor in Season Two and Tim now. Which means that Dean O'Dell's killer once gave me a drunken wedgie. Kinda cool.
This episode was pretty great, but it was a bit different than the previous ones, not because of the lack of thriller-ness, which a lot of people didn't care for, but because catching O'Dell's killer wasn't of super-major intensity to Veronica (whereas finding Lilly's killer and the bus bomber was, and the rapist became important once he tried to rape Veronica), so there was a lack of... conenction, despite the fact that she liked O'Dell so much. Alas. But, still awesome stuff. But, now, six weeks off, thanks to Who Will be the next
All in all: A-
Until then, same bat time, same bat channel.
24 6.11: Day 6 - 4:00PM - 5:00PM
"Worried about me is one thing, but charging into the men's bathroom is borderline obsessive."
Ding dong, the Wayne is dead. Which old Wayne? President Wayne!
Well, I guess technically, Wayne Palmer isn't dead... yet. But he's been blowed up by a bomb, or at least the cliffhanger lets us think so. I'm hoping he is dead, however, for several reasons:
1. The writers will be a centimeter closer to redeeming themselves for not killing off President... Keeler (was that his name? Yes, it was) season 4 when they blew up Air Force One. Though it won't redeem for many, many other things.
2. President Wayne Palmer DOES NOT EQUAL President David Palmer. God rest his soul.
3. The story possibilities are endless if Wayne is killed - Evil Vice President Noah Daniels takes over the country, more Muslim correctional facility wackiness, Lennox accused (and possibly teaming up with a bereaved Sandra Palmer to find the killers)... but we'll see.
Before all of that good fun, we had other things to worry about. First of all, Jack Bauers glowers some more as he is whisked away to LumberLogan's super secret cabin getaway, where the government has placed him under house arrest in return for not arresting him for being involved with the Day 5 conspiracy. LumberLogan convinces President Palmer (before said assassination attempt) to let out for the evening, so he and Jack can go to the Russian consul to find out... something (I think find out where Gredenko is planning to set off the bombs... or something), as a result of blackmail. Since the Russians were also involved with the conspiracy... which is interesting considering that President Subarov and his wife were almost killed. This plotline for the hour mostly consists of Jack and LumberLogan getting dressed for the occassion. That's right, forty-five minutes worth. Those are two bitches when it comes to getting dressed, and to think that it took Jack three minutes to shave off his beard at the beginning of Day 2. You're getting up there, old man!
Morris, my favorite character still, is doing his job, and Chloe and Nadia (shut the hell UP, Nadia!) and all the rest of CTU is worried that he's not doing his shit. So, Chloe calls his sponsor, Bart Simpson, and Bart tells her that she hasn't spoken to Morris in a few years. Which causes Chloe to storm into the bathroom, into the stall where Morris is dropping the kids off at the pool, and totally makes an ass of herself. Such is the CTU drama.
In the "Secret Lovers" storyline, Lennox is tied up, knocked around, and Reed's one co-conspirator plants a bomb in the podium where Wayne and Dr. Bashir are going to give their televised speech. Reed tries to comfort Lennox and tries to clean his wounds lovingly while trying to save his life, and then goes to plant the bomb. This assassination attempt, by the way, is really sloppy. The bomb will kill you only if you're within ten feet of it. That's lame. But, the bomb goes off, and either Dr. Bashir or Wayne OR BOTH are dead.
But I guess we'll find out til next time.
All in all: B-
Until next time, same bat time, same bat channel.
Ding dong, the Wayne is dead. Which old Wayne? President Wayne!
Well, I guess technically, Wayne Palmer isn't dead... yet. But he's been blowed up by a bomb, or at least the cliffhanger lets us think so. I'm hoping he is dead, however, for several reasons:
1. The writers will be a centimeter closer to redeeming themselves for not killing off President... Keeler (was that his name? Yes, it was) season 4 when they blew up Air Force One. Though it won't redeem for many, many other things.
2. President Wayne Palmer DOES NOT EQUAL President David Palmer. God rest his soul.
3. The story possibilities are endless if Wayne is killed - Evil Vice President Noah Daniels takes over the country, more Muslim correctional facility wackiness, Lennox accused (and possibly teaming up with a bereaved Sandra Palmer to find the killers)... but we'll see.
Before all of that good fun, we had other things to worry about. First of all, Jack Bauers glowers some more as he is whisked away to LumberLogan's super secret cabin getaway, where the government has placed him under house arrest in return for not arresting him for being involved with the Day 5 conspiracy. LumberLogan convinces President Palmer (before said assassination attempt) to let out for the evening, so he and Jack can go to the Russian consul to find out... something (I think find out where Gredenko is planning to set off the bombs... or something), as a result of blackmail. Since the Russians were also involved with the conspiracy... which is interesting considering that President Subarov and his wife were almost killed. This plotline for the hour mostly consists of Jack and LumberLogan getting dressed for the occassion. That's right, forty-five minutes worth. Those are two bitches when it comes to getting dressed, and to think that it took Jack three minutes to shave off his beard at the beginning of Day 2. You're getting up there, old man!
Morris, my favorite character still, is doing his job, and Chloe and Nadia (shut the hell UP, Nadia!) and all the rest of CTU is worried that he's not doing his shit. So, Chloe calls his sponsor, Bart Simpson, and Bart tells her that she hasn't spoken to Morris in a few years. Which causes Chloe to storm into the bathroom, into the stall where Morris is dropping the kids off at the pool, and totally makes an ass of herself. Such is the CTU drama.
In the "Secret Lovers" storyline, Lennox is tied up, knocked around, and Reed's one co-conspirator plants a bomb in the podium where Wayne and Dr. Bashir are going to give their televised speech. Reed tries to comfort Lennox and tries to clean his wounds lovingly while trying to save his life, and then goes to plant the bomb. This assassination attempt, by the way, is really sloppy. The bomb will kill you only if you're within ten feet of it. That's lame. But, the bomb goes off, and either Dr. Bashir or Wayne OR BOTH are dead.
But I guess we'll find out til next time.
All in all: B-
Until next time, same bat time, same bat channel.
Thursday, March 1, 2007
Grey's Anatomy 3.17: Some Kind of Miracle
"You are anything but ordinary."
Oh, yes you are, Grey's Anatomy episode. Yes, you are.
As the finale to the huge three-parter of this season, this episode is a wonderfully surreal and symbolic ending to a few weeks of total hell for all involved at Seattle Grace, penned by Shonda and Marti Noxon (aka TV's Marti Noxon, as she is apparently known in the Grey's offices). Apparently a lot of people hated this episode, but then again, I'm judging based on the feedback on TWoP, and that's the worst place to judge reactions since it's an absolute rule to hate all TV on there. Judging from the Grey's writers blog page, a lot of people loved this episode, so who knows.
I am one of the latter. I think this is one of the best, if not the best, episode the show has done thusfar. It wasn't without its flaws, of course, but on a completely emotional level, this episode is fairly unsurpassed. The Super Bowl extravaganza, "It's the End of the World" and "(As We Know It)," was great in introducing a new level of intensity that the show hadn't had previously shown, but I think it was then topped by the three-part finale ("17 Seconds," "Deterioration of the Flight or Fight Response," and "Losing My Religion," respectively... I just love this show's episode title gimmicks... I want to write a show where I have episode title gimmicks), which in turn has been topped by this three parter.
Mostly because of the stuff between Meredith and Ellis. Their story, which started in the pilot, has been a really subtle thing that has explained a good chunk of Meredith's psychology. Meredith is "dark and twisty" and "sleeps with inappropriate men," according to the other characters on the show, all of which is completely true. She does this stuff because Ellis is the perfect surgeon and has always considered her daughter to be ordinary, plus the really cool stuff with Meredith following Ellis' footsteps, what with both getting involved with another married doctor while being a surgical intern (the main difference, however, is that Ellis' affair with Richard was doomed, while Derek ended up leaving Addison for Meredith). Anyways, with Meredith hanging out with Doc the dog, Denny, Dylan who turned into pink mist, Bonnie the train girl, and Liz, Ellis' scrub nurse, in the afterlife, she has time to contemplate things about life and determines that she's been borderline-suicidal in the last few days (which makes sense, seeing as how she tried to drown herself in the tub a few episodes ago). When she senses that she might die, she is urged by Ellis (who dies from cardiac arrest brought on by a tirade against her by Derek) to go back to life, and they share a truly poignant good-bye, which is really tragic, but strangely fitting.
Now, of course, it sounds sappy on paper, and it totally is. But nobody does sappy like Grey's, so it works. And it works within the Grey's universe on a completely symbolic level. Realistically, Meredith would not be able to sit up and talk a few hours after being clinically dead, and "coming back from the light" stories are told to death, but I argue that without the soapy relationship stuff that makes up most of the show, these really intense episodes wouldn't work because we need those relationships and connections to get an emotional core to the stories, and that's what this show does exceptionally well.
Briefly elsewhere, Izzie confronts Callie in a truly bitchy way about how the George-Callie union is a sham, and George symbolically smacks Izzie by sticking with Callie at the end of the crisis. Izzie is a dumb bitch, really, even though she is visited by Denny's ghost in a sweet closing shot, though it wasn't nearly as affecting since Izzie has been a BIG BITCH all episode long. Alex helps his Jane Doe through her face-melting crisis (the prosthetics for the character are amazing), and Addison selfelssly counsels Derek through the Meredith stuff. Addison rocks... but enough for her own spin-off? I don't know about that.
All in all: A+
Until next time, same bat time, same bat channel.
Oh, yes you are, Grey's Anatomy episode. Yes, you are.
As the finale to the huge three-parter of this season, this episode is a wonderfully surreal and symbolic ending to a few weeks of total hell for all involved at Seattle Grace, penned by Shonda and Marti Noxon (aka TV's Marti Noxon, as she is apparently known in the Grey's offices). Apparently a lot of people hated this episode, but then again, I'm judging based on the feedback on TWoP, and that's the worst place to judge reactions since it's an absolute rule to hate all TV on there. Judging from the Grey's writers blog page, a lot of people loved this episode, so who knows.
I am one of the latter. I think this is one of the best, if not the best, episode the show has done thusfar. It wasn't without its flaws, of course, but on a completely emotional level, this episode is fairly unsurpassed. The Super Bowl extravaganza, "It's the End of the World" and "(As We Know It)," was great in introducing a new level of intensity that the show hadn't had previously shown, but I think it was then topped by the three-part finale ("17 Seconds," "Deterioration of the Flight or Fight Response," and "Losing My Religion," respectively... I just love this show's episode title gimmicks... I want to write a show where I have episode title gimmicks), which in turn has been topped by this three parter.
Mostly because of the stuff between Meredith and Ellis. Their story, which started in the pilot, has been a really subtle thing that has explained a good chunk of Meredith's psychology. Meredith is "dark and twisty" and "sleeps with inappropriate men," according to the other characters on the show, all of which is completely true. She does this stuff because Ellis is the perfect surgeon and has always considered her daughter to be ordinary, plus the really cool stuff with Meredith following Ellis' footsteps, what with both getting involved with another married doctor while being a surgical intern (the main difference, however, is that Ellis' affair with Richard was doomed, while Derek ended up leaving Addison for Meredith). Anyways, with Meredith hanging out with Doc the dog, Denny, Dylan who turned into pink mist, Bonnie the train girl, and Liz, Ellis' scrub nurse, in the afterlife, she has time to contemplate things about life and determines that she's been borderline-suicidal in the last few days (which makes sense, seeing as how she tried to drown herself in the tub a few episodes ago). When she senses that she might die, she is urged by Ellis (who dies from cardiac arrest brought on by a tirade against her by Derek) to go back to life, and they share a truly poignant good-bye, which is really tragic, but strangely fitting.
Now, of course, it sounds sappy on paper, and it totally is. But nobody does sappy like Grey's, so it works. And it works within the Grey's universe on a completely symbolic level. Realistically, Meredith would not be able to sit up and talk a few hours after being clinically dead, and "coming back from the light" stories are told to death, but I argue that without the soapy relationship stuff that makes up most of the show, these really intense episodes wouldn't work because we need those relationships and connections to get an emotional core to the stories, and that's what this show does exceptionally well.
Briefly elsewhere, Izzie confronts Callie in a truly bitchy way about how the George-Callie union is a sham, and George symbolically smacks Izzie by sticking with Callie at the end of the crisis. Izzie is a dumb bitch, really, even though she is visited by Denny's ghost in a sweet closing shot, though it wasn't nearly as affecting since Izzie has been a BIG BITCH all episode long. Alex helps his Jane Doe through her face-melting crisis (the prosthetics for the character are amazing), and Addison selfelssly counsels Derek through the Meredith stuff. Addison rocks... but enough for her own spin-off? I don't know about that.
All in all: A+
Until next time, same bat time, same bat channel.
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